Twins
by Witchdoctr
Summary: Beyond Birthday and L Lawliet are twins, sharing a bond. A bond that can be broken and hurt if one twin goes off the edge.   AU, abuse, no yaoi, sorry folks. Still very, very new to fan fiction, so... it's a bit weak at some parts, but I won't go back and edit because I can see if I improved.
1. Each Other

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**I was bored. I think too much. I have no life. The list goes on and on. I had to write this to get it out of my mind. Don't kill me. I'll come back to life and get revenge. HEHEHEHEHE! JK. But really, don't kill me. **

B woke up. His first glance was to the window. It was dark out, the kind of darkness that could be either night or early morning. His clock said it was 3 a.m., so morning.

His twin, his brother, his best friend, the other half of his soul, and the only thing he loved more than himself, (God that sounded corny, even in his head) was already awake. Both boys were insomniacs, L worst of all. He probably hadn't slept at all that night. Well, technically it was morning, but the outcome was the same, regardless of terminology: he hadn't slept. B studied the scrawny form of his brother, whose back was to him as he stared at the moon. He was so thin, so wiry. His spine was curved from being crouched over so often, but what really worried Beyond was just how pronounced it was, how skeletally thin L clearly was. It was something, the only thing really, that physically distinguished the two brothers apart,

They shared the same face, same hair, same genius. Both were anti-social, preferring to talk to each other or spend time with each other rather than others, than "outsiders." But there were some subtle differences in their nature. And some not-so subtle differences.

L was calm, controlled. He had a blank face, devoid of emotion. His head ruled his heart, so his first response to the phenomenon around him was always logical and practiced, as opposed to quick flashes of "instinct-first-thought-later." He did have emotions, but prefered to keep them to himself, where they belonged, in his mind, rarely showing them to anyone except to B. He didn't trust anyone but B with his heart.

But B, how did they phrase it exactly?

Wore his heart on his sleeve.

B was wild, uncontrollable. He was passionate, his face an open book, or more like a movie, projecting his words and his thoughts in a heartbeat. His heart ruled his head and he let rage and emotion control him, drive his actions first and foremost. Both traits were useful and had their weaknesses, but together they balanced each other out. Make a "perfect" being, one who could stand up for himself, make daring decisions, be blunt and bold, strong and decisive, but also a person who was smart about it, who didn't act rashly or without thought, who used that bluntness and strength productively, wisely.

In time, L would learn to be both.

But for now, he needs his brother, the only one he'd ever loved.

L turned his head, feeling the force of his brother's stare. "Good morning, B."

"Morning," B replied and he swung his legs out of bed.

Three hours later, everyone else woke up. L and B sat with the only people who would sit with them. Matt, Mello, and Near. Kids often whispered that the best students always sat together because they thought they were better. It wasn't true, well, no technically. It was just hard for geniuses to talk to people who weren't geniuses as well. The five who sat together were the five who were the most similiar, who could talk to one another without having to explain themselves twice, who understood that being different wasn't all bad.

L liked talking to Near. Sometimes, even his own twin had trouble keeping up with him, but Near had "near" the same cognitive ability as him, and the same attitude, so it was easiest to talk to him. Beyond liked talking to Mello the most, probably because they were both easily excitable and could avidly discuss things that L and Near didn't care about, like movies or videogames. Speaking of the latter, Matt had everyone at the table beat. He was the best when it came to technology of any sort and he was more than capable of keeping up with Beyond and L, in any of their discussions, so he never felt out of place with any of them.

Classes began. When it came to studies, every child was different, completely different. Mello was a hardworker and was constantly studying and working to be the best. He had the most determination in the orphanage. Near was better than him without even trying. And of course, Mello was insanely jealous and even made Near his "rival" so that he could focus and pin his determination on someone. He needed something to focus his hig energy on and he chose Near, his class genius.

Matt, being in their class, was technically "third' but since he didn't give a shit, neither Near or Mello thought of him as a threat. His focus was videogames and cheat codes and hacking and napping in class, so he generally faded into the background, but that was fine with Matt. Being third smartest genius in his class? Good enough for him. Smart enough to be called a genius, but not smart enough to have to deal with all this "competition" crap. It took a certain drive of motivation to be the "best" and it wasn't really one Matt possesed. He liked being in the middle, as a chaotic neutral, as a troublemaker, but not a competitor. It was the only way to go, in his opinion.

Beyond didn't agree. He was very competitve. So competitive, in fact, that even his brother was a "rival" to him. His brother was the smartest kid at the orphanage, probably the smartest genius child in the _world _and yet, he didn't seem to care too much about titles or recognition. He was fine with being unknown. Unfortunately, in a school of geniuses, being the number one genius made you stand out. And sometimes standing out is as desirable as being a nail sticking out the wood that needs to be hammered down properly.

"Hey loser!" L looked up from his book. It was a rare day, ond of the rare days when B was somewhere else, away from him. He and Mello had dragged an unwilling Near away to pull a prank on a teacher. The only reason L wasn't with them, was because they could only drag one unwilling scrawny child. And they chose Near.

"Hello, C." L went back to reading, hoping they would go away. But not really expecting it.

A rock hit his head. He gasped in pain. Blood trickled down his neck, dropping a little on his book. L stared at it, fascinated at the color of dark red on pale white, for a reason he couldn't fathom. "Are you retarded or something?" C asked. He and his three friends were barely a foot away, towering over him. L didn't answer, pretending to read, not even wanting to dignify such a ridiculous assumption with a response. But they hadn't really expected a response.

L didn't see it coming. He had his book in front of his face, hoping they would get the hint. They got it. They just simply ignored it.

L dropped his book and his head slammed into the tree he'd been leaning on. His legs dug into his chest. He gasped, more surprised than hurt by the kick, the low blow that knocked his book out of his hands and showed him that they meant business. He had fallen back out of his normal crouch so that he now lay upright, his hands pressed against the tree's thick roots, his back against the trunk, and his legs straight instead of bent for one, having been knocked out from under him.

Burning, stinging pain lanced up his leg. L gasped and automatically clutched his leg, wanting to end the pain but not understanding. Why? Why was C trying to hurt him, again? Why did he enjoy doing such horrible things, things like kicking his book and stomping down on his leg? Frowning when he didn't hear the telltale crack of a bone being broken in his knee, which C had once heard before? C was inches away, his face barely five inches from L's."Leave me alone," L whimpered. "You didn't answer me. Are you retarded or not?" Craig asked, his hand reaching out to seize the other boy's hair and pin him to the tree. "No, I'm not. Only a mentally deficient person would ask that question," L said, knowing his reply would set the bully off. He was right. As per usual. And this was probably the only time when he wished he was wrong.

* * *

B looked for L. He was done pranking Mr. Moddred. He wanted to tell L all about it, but where was the kid? Normally he leaned against a tree and read a book during recess, but which tree? "L!" B yelled. Now he was worried. It was almost dinner time. Most of the kids were inside by now.

"L!" Faintly, B thought he heard someone whisper his name. "B?" He swerved around a tree and almost tripped on L.

He lay across the ground at the foot of the tree. He was unconscious, his arms splayed out in front of him, legs bent awkwardly. Blood splattered from his nose onto the ground and his shirt. There was some blood on his head too and it trailed down his neck. There was an ugly bruise on his temple and another on his cheek. His shoulders were hunched and tense, even though he was unconscious. "L!" B yelled, crouching down next to his twin. He shook his shoulder. "Wake up!" He pulled him away from the tree and put L's head in his lap. He stroked his brother's hair. "Who was it this time? I'll kill them!" B yelled angrily. Then his voice softened. "Why do you let them do this to you?" B asked sadly, brushing some of L's black hair from his face. His hands came up bloody.

* * *

_A fist smashed into his face repeatedly. L was barely conscious. The only reason he was still upright was because of the bullies holding his arms up. His head was spinning, figuratively and literally. He'd tried fighting, or at least running. C had yanked him back and sent him to the ground where they fought furiously. But C was bigger and it helped him straddle L. He smacked the boy underneath with enough fury to make his nose bleed. When C was sure L couldn't fight back, he'd hauled him up and the torture began. _

_"Hey, it's almost dinner! Let's go," one of them said. They let go of his arms and unrestrained, he fell to the ground. They kicked his ribs one last time before disappearing into the trees, leaving the young genius lying on the grass. The equivalent of what they wished he truly was: dirt. Nothing special, nothing exceptional, and certainly not something that was better than them. Dirt. Like leaving him in the dirt made them better than him, made him lower than they. _

_Simply cheap comfort, L had thought as he'd fallen unconscious. Pathetic. Pathetic. Or maybe-maybe I'm the pathetic one... maybe... because... I never... set them... stra..ight. _

* * *

B pulled L's arm around his shouler. He pulled his brother's prone body up and propped him against himself and began to drag/carry him back the way he'd come. L woke a few minutes later, probably at the semi-rough treatment. "B?" he whispered.

"L, you're awake. Good. What happened?" B demanded. L, though very light, seemed to get heavier every minute. But since he was awake, he began to help, walking himself, gingerly. He became lighter every step and then B was no longer supporting him and was in fact looking at his back. L was slightly ahead now. B lightly ran a finger up L's neck, following the blood trail to L's face. "The usual," L sighed.

"Who was it?" B demanded.

"I'm not going to tell you."

"Why not? We're twins. No secrets, especially ones that hurt," B said.

"This doesn't hurt anyone," L said, then wishing he could recall it, knowing how wrong his words were. "It hurts you. And then it hurts me. I'm going to kill whoever did this to you, L, with or without your cooperation," B threatened.

"That's why I'm not going to tell you. I don't want you getting expelled. You're the only family I have."

B hugged his seven minutes and thirty seconds younger brother, causing him to wince slightly as B's fingers grazed bruises and cuts. This was enough to get B angry again. "Damn, why don't you fight them?" he exploded. It was raining now, but neither boy changed pace. They minded neither rain, nor wetness and both appreciated the soothing coolness on their skins, particularly L, whose skin ached. It felt calming, like the cool water was reassuring him that the stains would fade with time, as would the memories of the pain.

"I tried, but they won," L protested. "They always do. What would be the point?" B didn't respond, only putting his arm around his twin's shoulder, careful to avoid all visible bruises. The Whammy house came into view. If anyone had been watching from the windows of the Whammy House, and I'm not saying no one was, they would've seen two brothers who'd went through thick and thin, through hell and high water together, walking together alone to face the world alone. And were okay with it, as long as they had each other to lean on.

* * *

**Too bad Beyond's psycho, huh? Please Rrview. This is my first not-totally-sucky-fanfiction. **

**Thank you guys so much!:) **

**Fangfan1: thank u. and yes, I did upload twice. I'm having trouble with my account and it keeps doing that. I can replace them with current chapters, but I understand it's annoying. Sorry. **

**Josefin Tonks: thank u 2. is it really wonderful? i though it was kinda pathetic. **

**BeyondMadness: I doubt that. **

**EDIT: About a year later, here I am, editing what was one of my first stories! How odd, right? **

**I edited this, going over it for stuff a beta-reader would go over it, because I don't have one and didn't have on and probably never will. No, nothing in the story is going to change, not major events or plot or anything, but I do want you to know I'm editing this to make it better and more... cohesive. **


	2. No One

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**I was bored. I think too much. I have no life. The list goes on and on. I had to write this to get it out of my mind. Don't kill me. I'll come back to life and get revenge. HEHEHEHEHE! JK. But really, don't kill me. **

**"**I won't do it!"

"Yes you will."

"No, I don't want to."

"Did I ask you what you wanted? You're going to the medical room whether you want to or not!"

"You're not serious... hey!"

The children of the Whammy House watched with amusement as Beyond Birthday picked up a protesting, but too-weak-to-fight, at the moment, L into his arms and began running him to the medical room. It was amusing to see what antics B did with his brother. It was the only time the two acted normal, or at least, like human beings. Otherwise, the two were too intelligent and intellectual to really interact with without feeling uncomfortable. It wasn't just that, though. Most of the kids at the Whammy House were geniuses and could handle advanced intellects. It was also the matter of just how close they seemed, an unnaturally close bond, and just how similiar they looked.

The only real way to tell who was who, was to study their eye colors. L's eyes were gray-black, bottomless, like outer space or a black hole that would suck all light into it. B's eyes were a fiery red that scared some people. B liked to wear contacts that changed his eye color to gray-black. He liked to fool around with people that way and when he was wearing contacts, no one could tell them apart. Not even Watari. Only Near could figure it out, by noticing the subtle difference between their bodies, but even he could only tell after a minute or so.

But of course, everyone could tell them apart when one simply opened his mouth, simply because of their vast personality differences.

L was furious. Being carried up the stairs by his brother was demeaning, but he mostly he was dreading seeing C who slept near the medical room. L prayed he was still at dinner.

B noticed L wince every time he turned a corner and quickened his pace faster. "Put me down!" L exclaimed. "I can walk!" "But will you?" Beyond asked. "No," L admitted. "Then let me carry you, my princess!"

"Ha-ha," L said sarcastically. He struggled against B's hold, but it was like iron. "Let go of my leg! That's the one they stomped on!"

"My, my, what's wrong with you?" Dr. Brenna asked. She was very young for a doctor. She'd been offered many good positions all around the world being renowned for being the world's youngest doctor ever, but she's refused, saying she wanted to work with the Whammy children, because it was the orphanage that had taught her. So she did, to Mr. Whammy's displeasure. He was always arguing that she had so much potential that must not be wasted and that she should move on. She would stubbornly say that she belonged here. He disagreed. Very much.

"Nothing," L snapped. Brenna stared at him. "Something's wrong with his leg and his ribs, I think," B said, ignoring his brother's dirty look. "There's nothing wrong with me! Just a bruise and a few cuts. Nothing," L protested. "And how did you get them?" Brenna asked. "Someone beat him up, but he won't tell me who," B said frustratedly. "Would you tell me?" Brenna asked L. "Not if your going to tell another adult," L said. "Why don't you want another adult knowing? Take off your shirt, I have to check for broken bones," Brenna ordered. L slipped his shirt off and everyone in the room gasped, except L, who just grimaced.

Where his ribs were, was a a large black bruise. It was the size of a foot, swelling, and it was disgusting to look at. The doctor behind her stared at L in amazement.

"That looks like it hurts."

"No duh," B said. "It does hurt. Escpecially when my oh-so-gentle-brother carried me up the stairs,"L added.

"I didn't know. Why didn't you tell me? I'm sorry," B said remorsefully. "I was just kidding. It hurt my ribs, but not as much as when I was leaning on you, that was-ouch," L whimpered as Brenna poked the rib. "It's fractured. Remove your pants."

"Why?" L asked at the same time as B.

"Because if you have a broken leg, pants will hinder me."

L removed his pants, bare except his underwear. He looked painfully thin, to both of them, and his ribs were so pronounced that anyone could see he had a broken rib, what with the grotesque, misshapen lump. His legs were skinny, but wiry. On one leg, the knee was purplish-black. "Is it broken?" B asked worriedly.

"No. It's just painful and it's going to make walking hard. No more questions. I need to concentrate."

Five minutes later, B was forced to go to dinner, feeling L's worried eyes on his back as he left the room. He didn't talk to anyone, staring wistfully at the seat where L usually sat. He poked his dinner around eyeing the people that might've done that to his brother. Finally he narrowed it down to three people, JB, VC, and C. JB seemed unlikely since he'd been in detention the whole day. VC wasn't the physical bully. He liked to mess with people's minds. He liked to pick on L because he was the only one Victor had never elicited any emotional response from. Many times, B had hit him, but L had never shed a tear or reacted in anyway.

So it was C, hm? He thought about it, checking off all the hints. Check check check. Time to go in for the kill.

L winced. Every time he took a breath, pain would lance up his chest. His ribs were bound with gauze, uncomfortable, but necessary. "Do I really have to sleep in here?" L whined at Brenna. She smiled. "Yes, sir. Absolut-" her words were cut off by angry yelling. "You fucking bastard! I will kill you!" L stood up and promptly fell as his leg buckled. As his ribs hit the floor, he gave an agonized yelp and whoever was yelling grew silent. Then there was the pounding beat of footsteps and the door swung open, catching L's head and sending him into the wall and banging his ribs. He screamed as his ribs were hit _again._ They burned like fury and his eyes watered automatically. He couldn't see who it was that grabbed his arms and hauled him up. He assumed it was Beyond, but tensed up as the image became clearer and clearer until he was looking at C.

"It wasn't me! Tell him, L," C said, his eyes sparkling dangerously. He stood in front of L, with B behind him. _Say anything and you're dead, _C's eyes said. "It wasn't C, B," L said hoarsely. C smiled and put an arm around L's shoulder, making sure to touch a few bruises. L shivered unvoluntarily as C's hand chilled his skin.

B's eyes narrowed.

He'd seen.

No one hurt his brother and got away with it. No one.


	3. Red Haze

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**I was bored. I think too much. I have no life. The list goes on and on. I had to write this to get it out of my mind. Don't kill me. I'll come back to life and get revenge. HEHEHEHEHE! JK. But really, don't kill me. I'm new to this fanfiction world. Still wet behind the ears.**

As soon as B was gone C gripped L's throat. "Tell anyone and you'll be six feet under, got it genius?" he hissed, pulling L's face close to his own. "Understood."

B was upset. Ever since their parents had died, they'd always had been together when they went to sleep. When they were seperated, bad things happened. Mostly to L. He seemed to be a magnet for suffering. The last time L had been away from B, he'd ended up almost drowning in a pool. Before that he'd "fallen" off a roof. Yes, Beyond knew what really happened, though L hadn't told him.

B stared at his brother's bed, so empty, so cold, so alone. He pulled the covers up to prevent the chill getting underneath and patted the pillow tenderly. Loneliness formed in the pit of his stomach. Ridiculous. Loneliness? He'd been with his brother, what? Forty seconds ago? How could he depend on someone so much? It was ridiculous. But love is ridiculous. That's what L would say. His emotions were in check, so his sentence made sense, especially coming out of his mouth. It didn't seem like he loved anyone.

* * *

L woke up at the same time B did, though he didn't know it. He tried to get out of bed, but had some trouble with his ribs, which spiked in pain each time he jostled them. He carefully put one leg down gently and then the other. He braced himself for the sudden weight and got out of bed. Stars burst to life in front of his eyes. He grasped his head and swayed a little. "Whoa, what are you doing, you idiot?" B darted forward and took his brother's arm. L leaned against him.

"I was trying to get up," L muttered. "I guess I'm weaker than I thought." "Damn straight," B growled. "Are you a masochist?" "Maybe," L mumbled as B sat him back down. They sat together on the bed. It was later than they usually woke up. It was almost five. They stared out the window together, as they had since they were five and barely reached the window. Even back then, they'd been more than brothers. Two halves of a soul that fitted the other perfectly. They almost never fought, even though they were siblings and it was nature to do so. They annoyed each other sometimes, but never hurt the other, physically or mentally. Not yet.

* * *

"I want to go to class."

"No!"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"You fractured a rib!"

"So?"

"So you can't go to class."

"I'll miss something important."

"Like getting a hernia?"

"Shut up, Matt."

"He has a point, L."

"Do we have to tie you to the bed?"

"Wow, Mello, I thought you were straight."

"You know what I meant, Matt! If there's anyone here who's gay, it's you, not me!"

"Hey, if I were, then I'm not anywhere near as kinky as you seem to be!"

A giggle. Mello punched Matt's arm.

"This isn't getting anywhere. You're staying in bed and that's final."

The brothers stared each other down, neither willing to blink. It was a couple of hours after they'd woken up. L wanted to go to classes, B didn't want him to. Their friends were all taking B's side, seeing L's condition. They'd been arguing for some time. Matt made jokes, Mello made threats, Near made logical observations, L argued and B yelled a lot. "I'll get up anyway," L said mutinously.

"Not if you don't want me and Mello literally carrying you back to your bed," B threatened.

L glared at him and didn't respond. "Will you bring me my work, then?" L asked, grudgingly.

"Sure thing," Matt said cheerfully. "Come on, I'll help you go downstairs and we can have breakfast."

L refused the help and he got up on his own. His leg didn't hurt at all and his ribs felt fine, so he began arguing again at breakfast.

"I'm fine."

"You need rest!"

"I have some bruises! That's it! It doesn't ruin my cognitive ability."

"You're internally bleeding!"

"Not anymore."

In the end, B lost. L ran from him and, proving he could use his legs, got to his classroom before B could stop him. B spent the whole lesson passing notes to him, asking anxiously if he was okay, if he felt faint, or didn't think he could handle it. L replied with scathing remarks and observations before not even bothering to respond at all. Beyond threw a piece of crumpled paper at the back of his head. When L turned around to glare at him, the paper sticking in his spiky black hair, B gave him two thumbs up, grinning cheesily.

And things went back to normal. The gang hung out together as frequent as possible. Near and L were the children most likely to shrink away from groups like that, but people like Mello and Matt made it easy. Beyond, being a mix of Near and Mello incarnate, was a perfect bridge that all of them could cross, could use to bond with one another, and avoid being trapped on their personal, lonely islands.

Of course, good things never last long.

It was two months since L had been found in the woods. C had left him alone for some time, letting him get back on his feet only because he was afraid he would get caught. Now was the perfect time, when L wasn't expecting it.

It was noon. L was out early, having skipped lunch for a strawberry cake instead. It had disappeared and now he studied for his physics test. It was pleasantly and unusually warm for the end of autumn. He was feeling sleepy and his senses were lazy. Which was why he was caught off guard.

A hand clamped around his mouth. He grunted in surprise and began to struggle. "Scream and I will kill you," C whispered. L froze. He was dragged backwards off the bench and hit the ground, knocking the breath out of him.

"Good, L. You didn't tell on me. And you're not going to tell on me now, are you?" C sneered. He was alone this time but he'd had the element of surprise. Inwardly, L cursed himself, scolding himself for not being more careful and watchful.

* * *

B left the cafeteria a few minutes after L did. He'd seen his brother slip out the door, his strawberry cake frosting still on his fingers. He'd finished the cake really fast, almost drinking it. B, himself, had strawberry jam on his fingers from his sandwich. He would've gladly eaten jam with his bare hands without pause, but Watari wouldn't allow it. So he followed L, having nothing else to do now. Mello eyed him, but couldn't tear himself away from his chocolate bar that he'd snuck in. "I'll come with you," Matt said, like he had read B's mind.

Together they left the room. It was strangely sunny out for autumn and unusually warm. There was L. Sitting on a bench, just out of vantage point of the Whammy House. Two seconds he was there, the next second he was gone. Both teens began running to the bench. As they got closer, it became clear where L was. He was on the ground and being dragged backwards. By C. B yelled in rage. He dove at C, knocking the boy off his brother. He, being bigger and stronger, overpowered him easily.

B straddled C and began punching him, so fiercely that he begged for mercy. But B only saw red, raw anger. Blood rushed in his ears and clouded his senses. Something made his hands curl around the boy's neck and squeeze. Matt was yelling, but B was deaf. Something tried to drag him away from C and B let go with one hand and shoved them away. Again and again and suddenly the person tackled him, throwing him off C, who had turned red, almost blue. B screamed insensibly and fought the person, who had his arms around his shoulders. He flipped, knocking the person off and he leaped on top, straddling the person. He began punching. The person didn't fight back or struggle, but B only saw red. A red haze covered his eyes and all he saw was the color. He hit the person again and again, each time harder and each time the person grunted and struggled to get away. But B wouldn't let him.

* * *

L watched in horror as B began to strangle C. He was all right with with B hitting his tormentor a few times, but it was getting out of control. B was getting out of control. And for the first time, L was afraid he couln't stop B this time.

Matt seized B's shoulder and tried to yank him off the boy, but Beyond released one hand and shoved him away, sending the weaker boy sprawling. C was turning blue. L tackled his twin. B was much bigger, but he was distracted and L's tackle had been a good one. L's arms wrapped around B's shoulders like a hug. B thrashed and fought, hitting wildly. L winced every time his fists or legs caught him. He began to retreat, but B followed. His red eyes seemed to glow with hatred and L took a step back in alarm. B hit him. Again. Again. L didn't have the heart to fight him.

Again.

Again.

Harder this time.

Harder.

Harder again.

L tried to get away, but his twin was too strong.

"B, what are you doing? OH MY GOD!"

* * *

Dr. Brenna's voice broke the red haze. B stared dazedly at the boy underneath him. Was it C? No. It couldn't be. "L?" B whispered. He got off and crouched at L's side. L's eyes were half-open. He seemed dazed and shocked, but what hurt B the most was the look of hurt betrayal. No hatred or anger, which B deserved, but pain. Betrayal. Sadness. And then the worst emotion of all. Fear.


	4. Canyon

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**I was bored. I think too much. I have no life. The list goes on and on. I had to write this to get it out of my mind. Don't kill me. I'll come back to life and get revenge. HEHEHEHEHE! JK. But really, don't kill me. I'm new to this fanfiction world. Still wet behind the ears. Still screwing up. **

Matt wanted to stop the twins from fighting, but he had to see if Craig was all right. Craig was a creep and a bully, but Matt had no desire to see him dead. Craig choked and made miserable honking noises, but otherwise seemed fine. L had stopped B in time. _L. _

Matt turned back to B and almost had a heart attack. B was hitting his own twin. Matt was stunned into simply watching with numb shock. They'd never even made the other brother cry, much less hit each other. And he knew he should stop it, but his legs didn't seem to work.

"OH MY GOD!"

#############

L was only half-conscious. He was seeing and hearing, but not processing much. His eye throbbed, his chest burned, his face stung, but worse, his heart ached. Fear. This was the first time he'd ever feared his brother. Betrayal. That hurt the most. His brother, after swearing to their mother to always protect each other, had hit him. Had hated him. The one person L loved had hated him. His eyes had been hateful. And it hurt.

"L, I-I didn't mean to... i mean, I didn't think... I was... I'm sorry," B pleaded to his twin. L simply stared at him, emotions churning in his normally blank face. And the emotions scared B. Dr. Brenna reported both boys to Watari and after checking on all three boys involved in the scuffle, she sent them to wait outside Watari's office. This was worse.

"I didn't think you guys even fought," Craig sneered. He sat in his chair like he was a king. He doubted he'd get in trouble. After all, B had tried to strangle him and then hit his own brother. The evidence was on L's face.

L didn't respond, staring at the floor with trembling lips. B stared at his brother's bowed head. There were bruises that _he_ had inflicted. He, who had sworn to take protect his twin to his mother who had died a year later. They had been seperated briefly to two different guardians chosen by the state, but they'd escaped and lived on the streets together for about a year before Whammy found them and took them in at age seven. Now, six years later, they were still here.

"Who's going to protect Loser now?" Craig taunted. L still didn't respond. B tried to catch his eye, but his twin was adamant and refused to meet his eye. "How does it feel? No one loves Loser. Not even his brother." B wasn't sure, but he thought he saw a tear in L's eye.

"Come in," Watari said, the door to his office opening so suddenly that they all jumped. L looked up and tears slid down B's face as he saw the black eye. It was really throbbing and probably hurt a lot. B reached over to touch L's eye, wanting to offer comfort, but L flinched. Watari noticed this, but said nothing as the boys took their seats. "What's the problem?"

He was assaulted by two different stories.

"I was minding my own business when-"

"I came outside and Craig was hitting my brother-"

"this maniac attacked me-"

"I hit him back and defended my brother-"

"Defended? I didn't give him a black eye-"

"I didn't mean to. He got in the way-"

"Oh that's rich. He got in the way so you took your anger out on your poor little brother-"

"That's not what I meant and-"

"Mr. Whammy, Beyond Birthday is insane and violent and he has anger issues-"

"Excuse me, but I don't hear L complaining."

Three eyes turned in unison. L's eyes were downcast. "What happened L?" Whammy probed gently.

L's throat felt dry. What could he say to keep both out of trouble? "Don't even think about lying to get both of them out of trouble. Someone gave you that black eye," Whammy said firmly. L stared at him and began speaking. "Craig attacked me, sir. He put his hand around my mouth and told me not to scream or he'd kill me. He dragged me to the woods, but B saw him and he attacked him. Being stronger, B straddled him and began to strangle him out of rage. I tackled him and-"

L's voice died down. He wouldn't speak anymore. "What happened B?" Whammy asked. "I-I hit him sir," B mumbled, peeking at L's face again. "Hit him? You hit him a lot," Craig protested. He didn't want to get in trouble and putting B to blame was going to be easy. "Two months ago, you beat him," B yelled. "Can you prove it?" Craig asked, eyes glinting. "Does that make it better? Trying to blame me for something that might've happended two months ago?"

"Boys, boys. We need a third party. Who is else saw you two fighting?" "Matt," L said dully. "I'll get him," Whammy said, standing up. No sooner had he gotten up and shut the door, Craig sneered. "You wimp." "He threatened to kill you?" B asked. L nodded. Something about his face made B ask, "How many times?" "Twice," L whispered. "Why do you care?"

Those four words hurt the most. B could take anything from heavy constant verbal abuse to physical torture, but those four words spoken by his partner in such a flat voice hurt. "I'm sorry, L. I don't know what came over me," B pleaded. "I'm sorry." L looked up. His eye was most swollen shut. "I know."

The door burst open and slapped the wall. Matt stormed in. "How could you B?" he yelled. "Your own family?" He began to rant, but his words would never hurt as much as L's. "Thank you Mr. Matt, though I'd appreciate less profanity next time."

"We can guess what happened then. "Craig, detention, four weeks for starting a fight and suspected bullying. B, suspended for four days, effective immediately. You may go. You two, however, stay back I want to talk to you."

As soon as Craig left, Whammy asked, "What is going on? I've seen siblings fight, but never siblings as close as you two." Neither responded and Whammy noticed how neither would look at the other. They both stared at oppposite directions and they looked like mirrors of each other, perfect replicas. There was very little difference besides eyes and body and strength. They were clearly family and friends, but something had cause a rift, a wedge between them, no not even a wedge, more like a canyon.

"I lost control sir. I won't let it happen again," B whispered. "I shouldn't have been so weak," was L's murmurred response.


	5. Not Even For You

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**I was bored. I think too much. I have no life. The list goes on and on. I had to write this to get it out of my mind. Don't kill me. I'll come back to life and get revenge. HEHEHEHEHE! JK. But really, don't kill me. I'm new to this fanfiction world. Still wet behind the ears. Still screwing up. **

**"**Did you hear?"

"What?"

"The dream team is split."

"You mean Beyond Birthday and L?"

"Yeah, them. They're twins-"

"No shit, Sherlock."

"-And Mr. Whammy found them fighting each other-"

"Over what?"

"I don't know. Sweets?"

"Man that B has issues. One guess who started the fight?"

"I don't know, but L's grades have been decreasing. Probably depression. Now Near has a chance. Hey, do you think that was B's plan all along? Maybe he wants to be the best and he's going to get rid of Near, but did L first because he was easiest!"

B squuezed his ears. He was sick of hearing the rumors. It was a week after the incident and his suspension was over, but it was far worse to hear mean and untrue rumors about you than staying home in hiding. And it was horrible. He had to sit at breakfast with all the other kids. He had to sit alone since none of his four friends would talk to him and that included his brother. He still woke up early with L, but they didn't talk anymore or stare out the window. Mornings were cold and L never said a word. "Are you mad at me?" B had asked. "No. I'm just...confused. Please give me some time to think, okay?"

L glanced at his brother across the cafeteria. He seemed completely deflated. Neither twin had had breakfast for four days because their stomachs were so laden with despair. L was getting up earlier and earlier until he wasn't sleeping at all and his bags got deeper and more pronounced, though they were helped along by the black eye that had yet to heal. B was waking up later and later until he didn't even see his brother anymore.

B caught L's gaze and neither could look away. B's eyes said it all. His pain, his remorse, his fear that his brother would leave him. And suddenly L was standing up and pacing to B's table. The cafeteria was silent. After all, they had all heard the rumors and many were excited to see a fight. They were disappointed.

L hugged Beyond. B hugged him back with all he had. L was much thinner, quite an achievement sinc he'd been all bones before. He seemed paler too and more sickly. Ignoring the stares and smiles of the other kids, they walked from the lunch room together, arms around each other's shoulders as usual.

They went back to their room. Now it seemed more welcoming to the brothers. No longer a waiting room to dread going in to.

B immediately shut the door and L sat on B's bed. He fiddled with his thumbs, wondering what to say as B came up and sat beside him. "You aren't weak, L," B said. L couldn't think of a response to this so remained silent. "I am weak. I couldn't hold back my emotions and I hurt someone I loved. I can't let it happen again." B turned to L and his hand trailed along the black eye bruise. L shivered involuntarily, but didn't retreat. His hand cupped his twin's cheek. How much older B looked.

How much gaunter L looked, B thought. His face was hollow and thin, sallow. His eyes were tired, emblazoned by the purple-black-blue eye bruise and his ever-present bags. His hand moved to his brother's chin, then let go. "I understand, but if I hadn't been so weak, I could've fought Craig and you wouldn't have been influenced to do something so desperate. If I had had the courage to tell someone, then none of this would've happened." "We complete each other, I guess," B said, smiling a little sadly. "I'm sorry." He'd said sorry many times before, but this was the first time L had really accepted it. They hugged again.

And the door swung open and their three friends crowded them.

"Oh good, he's not killing you, L."

"If L forgives you, I forgive you."

"You would say that, Mello."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know. I just wanted it out there, I guess."

"I hope you can improve your grades now that this emotional upheaval is over."

"Very touching, Near."

"What else can I say?"

"Something along the lines of 'yay they aren't fighting anymore'."

"Actually, we weren't fighting."

"No, we weren't. I just needed to-AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGG!"

Mello and Matt tackled L and seizing him, began to carry him. "Where are you taking me?"

"We're taking you outside. Don't think we don't notice how you haven't see daylight for the last four days. All you do is stare out the window like you wish you could, but can't or something stops you."

L began to struggle, but the boys held tighter. In the end they dumped him on the ground. "I have class," L struggled to get back inside, the sun burning his eyes, but Matt held his legs down and Mello held his shoulder down. Near watched their childish act with some amusement. "Let go of me. I won't run!" B laughed. "Don't want to know, don't want to know," Matt said. "Want to know what?" B snickered. "What you're laughing at. Don't show, don't tell, right?"

They laughed and B's stomach dread stone faded away completely. He was happy. He had four friends. He had his brother back. He lived in a beautiful home and had a future. Life would be good.

Good things never last. Not for Beyond Birthday, not for L Lawliet, not for anyone. Not even for you.


	6. Seperation Changes A Person

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with as moustache?**

_B was dreaming. He was dreaming of strangling Craig, his hands squeezing the life out of the boy. He laughed insanely in his dream, watching the life die out of his eyes. But suddenly it wasn't Craig B had killed. It was L and his pleading eyes never lost the ever-present brotherly love and affection he'd always had when looking at B. _

_The scene changed and B kneeled on a cliff. L was besides him, a dagger in his chest. Blood dripped from B's hands. B was laughing hysterically as he held L's head underneath the water as L struggled. B was shooting L, bullets flying from his gun with bangs that didn't drown out L's scream. L was tied to a pole in a burning building. L was falling off a building. B hit L with a car and blood splattered across the windshield._

_Then they stood on opposite sides of a veil, a wall between them. "Why did you kill me, B?" L whispered. "Now you have doomed yourself to this fate." L faded away, leaving B... alone. _

Beyond woke up screaming. L stared at him, eyes concerned. "B? Are you okay? What's wrong? You were thrashing around like a fish out of water in your bed, yelling my name." It was about two in the morning. It was two years since he'd almost killed Craig. Why was he dreaming about killing L? Was it because he wanted to hurt L? No, no way. He was having a nightmare. That was all.

But even when he'd convinced himself of this, his mind was still far away.

L glanced at B nervously. He hadn't mentioned what else B had yelled after his name.

Breakfast was quieter than normal. Mello and Matt were now the oldest residents and they were itching to go somwhere, do something. Near sat away from them, with L. He and Mello were privately locked in a fierce battle. Mello worked hard for his grades, Near didn't need to. The only reason Mello didn't hate L was because L wasn't aiming for the same spot that he and Near were aiming. He and B were going to work together instead of being the supersleuth that Watari envisoned.

"Are you going to wear a long coat and beige tri-cornered hat?" Matt asked Near. "Is that how you assume detectives look?" Near asked. "I don't know. What about a beanie with a feather?" Matt tried. "No, I'll just be myself," Near shrugged. "So how are you going to get publicity? Solve as many cases as possible? You know all the good cases will be taken by other detectives," Matt chirped. Near shrugged again. Then he turned to Mello. "We could work together, you know." "No we can't!"

Mello's scream echoed across the cafeteria and most of the kids stopped talking at once. "We cannot! I'm sick of being second! I'm leaving!" Mello stood up abruptly and just turned around and left. He just left. And so began the splitting of the infamous group. Near went to become N, the world's best detective. Matt followed Mello and both vanished into thin air. B and L left and rented an apartment in Tokyo.

Both boys were troubled and after one fateful day, they seperated. And didn't see each other for years. Not for five years. When they did meet again, they were on opposite sides. For the first time. And the last.


	7. Hostages and Rivals

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

"Wait! Stop the camera and zoom in!" B said, jabbing a finger at the computer screen. It was three in the morning and he sucked on strawberry jam. The hostages cowered against the wall. B would never admit it, but he would never kill a hostage. That was what he told himself anyway.

The camera zoomed and the strawberry jam jar fell from B's hand. "Is-is that- you, Boss?" his employee spluttered. "How could it be me, you idiot? I'm right here. No, I know who this is. Give me the megaphone," B snarled. His employee, Otohisa, hurriedly shoved the megaphone into his boss's hands. B fumbled for the switch, and turning it on, yelled into the megaphone. "L, how you doing?"

"Hello, B. Imagine that," L said softly. He looked straight at the camera and to B it seemed like L was looking right at him, through him, seeing his secrets, fears, and doubts. "Whatcha been doin'?" B slurred. "Nothing. just hanging around I suppose. What have you been doing? Wait, don't tell me. Touring the inside of jail cells?" "Snarky as ever, L," B sighed. "Still being the lapdog for the police? Or have you been promoted to bathroom attendent?"

"Actually, I'm not working with the police anymore. I'm a vigilante," L said quietly to the camera, though he might as well have shouted; his voice was picked up by the little microphones around the building and broadcasted around the building. "Finally, L's getting some spirit!" B crowed. "My, B. I've never heard you so pumped before," L said mildly. "So you're a vigliante, hm? How do you get money?"

"Listen, Beyond, as fun as it is to chat with you, I'm sorta busy." B watched the lithe form of his brother duck into a room and then duck out. "Oh, I understand. Like trying to rescue a load of hostages? And how do you propose getting in here without me killing all of them?" "Why on earth would I tell you?" L asked, amusement in his voice. He disappeared off the computer screen as he found a blind spot. "Don't question me, Beyond. I have my methods." Laughter. B hadn't realized how much he loved that laughter. How much he'd missed it.

"L, as mischevious as ever." B turned to his employees. "Kill him."

##############3

L chuckled to himself. He got a morbid thrill whenever he risked his life on a suicidal mission like this. The fact that his brother was here tightened the nerves in his stomach. He didn't know whether to be relieved or horrified that B was here. After all, they hadn't left each other on friendly terms.

He ducked around another corner. It was all for show of course. He had already deduced what floor they were on. He ducked under another blind spot. Any second his brother would send his employees to apprehend him. He needed to make this plan work. Hastily, he darted around a camera barely brushing passed it. He did it again, but slightly slower, just to make sure his brother saw him. Then he hacked the security camera base and prayed it would work.

##############3

B's employees looked relieved. As dumb as they were, they'd realized that the two were brothers and worried that B would change his mind. The hostages looked worried and glanced anxiously at the monitor. Something dashed by the camera. "L, you idiot. You've gotten stupid, working with the police so long," he muttered under his breath.

##############3

L implanted the data into the security system. Then he ran to the fifth floor, praying his improbable and less than forty percent plan would work.

##############3

B studied the camera screen. "There he is," B pointed at the left screen. "He's heading for the fifth floor. Kill him quickly. If he gets away, the plan is finished." Four of the guards ran to follow his orders. "He's pretty fiesty. Take another two with you. Don't hesitate to shoot." As they left, he smiled grimly and watched the bottom left screen and then the one above it where L should've appeared. And then, another flash, this time on the bottom right screen. B dropped his eyes to the image. "What the hell-? He's turning around! Fourth floor!"

Another flash. Another. This time in two completely different places. "Fourth floor, west side." Then, "Second floor, north side." And finally realization. "He tampered with this-"

The door burst open. L held his gun aloft, pointed at B's chest. "Don't move, B," he said. "Or what? You'll shoot me? Your own twin?" The brothers stared each other down. The hostages stared at the identical mirrors. Well, almost identical. Their captor wore a tight black t-shirt while his brother wore a loose white t-shirt, very saggy and careworn. "No. I can't shoot you." L deliberately turned his back and spoke into his ready cellphone. "I'm in. You can storm the building, but a warning. Gunmen are running around the building." A pause. "Yes, because of me. No of course not. NOt yet anyway. He's standing right here."

He hung up. B punched him. Or at least tried. "Sloppy," L sighed, having caught B's fist with his hand. He twisted it down, but held it facedown. He looked B in the eyes. "If you leave now, I'll let you escape." B stared at him, silently gauging the chances of his getting out with the money and without getting caught. The chances were about two percent and that wasn't including L holding his hand. "Fine. I accept," B snapped. "Let go of me!"

L did and B stumbled back. "This isn't over," B hissed. "When and why did you start to think of us as rivals, brother?" L sighed as be began to untie a hostage. "When you became a dtective and I became a criminal."


	8. Old Hurts

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

B didn't hate his brother. Disliked him at present, yes, was annoyed that his brother still worked with the police, but he didn't hate him. Beyond had actually missed him over the years they hadn't see each other. He wondered if L had.

So this was a temporary setback. B watched from a safe distance as his employees were arrested. None could tell the polive his name since they didn't know it and L would't tell the police. Hell, the police didn't know L's face or name. He always vanished before they could see him and his phone was rigged to alter his voice. So L wasn't quite a lapdog. B only knew because he'd read the news, hearing about two great detectives that could solve any case. The mysterious N and the unpredictable, but no less mysterious L. Near was doing well, obviously.

There was much speculation about both. N was supposed to be a genius, a mastermind and picking only cases he was interested in. L was supposed to be just as clever, but less subtle. He was more active and broke the law in the process of protecting it. A true badass maverick. This, people reasoned, wasn't so bad. L had a strong sense of justice, while N just wanted to win. The appeal for L instead of N was maybe because of his badass appearance and lack of regard for the law. No one knew L's face or voice either, but it made his appeal better.

B scowled. How stupid people could be.

He pulled his phone out. "Hey Matt?"

"Sup' B. Whatcha doin'?"

"I need your help."

"With what?"

"L."

"No, I'm not taking sides!"

"I just need you to hack his computer and open a channel between us. I just want to talk to him, okay?"

"Why don't you do this yourself?"

"Because he blocked me!"

"Actually I did. He asked me to."

"You said you weren't taking sides."

"I'm not. He paid me."

"Well, I'll pay you to hack him, okay?"

"How do you even have money?"

"I rob jewelry stores."

"Really?"

"No."

"Damn."

"Oh, really ,Matt? You give the Whammy boys a bad name."

"Me? What about you, Mr. Hostages?"

"I needed money. **Besides I'd have never killed anyone."**

Silence. Then-

"I've hacked him. He has a really good firewall and security system. Just not good enough to keep me out."

"Nothing keeps you out, Matt."

"Nothing keeps me in either."

"Yeah. How many jails have you broken in and out of?"

"Lost track. Here. I'm sending the link to you."

B clicked the button. Then, "Matt, curse you. You hacked my system."

"Good guess. But there wasn't much to hack."

"What do you want, B? You should be glad I didn't arrest you. Not after you tried to kill me."

"I knew they were incompetent. I knew they would never catch you!"

"Liar."

"Hurtful."

A sigh. Then-

"Why are you calling me?"

"I want to talk to you. Whatcha been doing?"

"Working."

"Specify."

"Why do you care?"

Again, those four words hurt. Just as much as they had seven years ago. "WE're twins. We whould be working together. Why did you give Near the job of supersleuth for me if we're not going to work together."

"As I recall, it wasn't my fault. You threatened to stab me, after all."

"I-I didn't mean it."

"Really B? Because I hear what you yell in your sleep. I heard you, but I didn't leave you because I hoped it wasn't true. When you said it, awake, I was done. I was sick of hearing different ways you could kill me, okay?"

B was speechless. "I-I didn't know you had heard."

"Well I did. Is that what you dream about? Killing me? Because the only thoughts I've ever had about you were ones with love."

The phone clicked off.

"That was...awkward."

"Shut the hell up, Matt. And hang up the damn phone!"


	9. And So It Begins

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

L worked on his computer. He didn't like the police. They were stupid and clumsy. There would have to be world mass killings by a crazy serial killer before he joined forces with them.

Curse Matt. Somehow he'd broken through L's security wall against B. He'd gotten through the wall and opened a connection between B's cellphone and L's laptop. How was that possible? L had no idea.

Hearing his brother act like he actually cared what L was doing had brought a whole new amount of hurt. Memories flooded back and he didn't bother to stem the tide.

_It was their first night out of the Whammy House since they were seven. There was a certain excitement. _

_L found a job as a detective for the police and he dragged B along. They looked down on L since he was only fifteen, sixteen as a year went by. They disliked B because he was always irritable and loud, disrespectful and scornful of everything they said. So they didn't miss B when he left._

_L watched his brother sleep. He'd left the office early amd was asleep when he'd gotten home at one a.m. "L!" B yelled, startling him into jumping. "I will kill you. I will stab you and let you bleed to death." Then rapidly his face changed from one of open hatred and malice to shock. "No! L, don't die, please don't die. I didn't mean to... I don't know."_

_It went on. That was only the first night. It got worse. L avoided his brother and B noticed. He wasn't sure why, but he began to feel guilty. When B sleep-talked, he grew more elaborate and described various ways to kill his twin, from slow deaths to fast deaths. Then he would cry and take it all back. It confused and scared L. It made him uneasy and set him on edge. _

_So on that fateful day, when they had their big argument and L heard the words from B while he was awake, he left. _

L jumped as his cell phone rang. He picked it up and groaned. "Hello, Near. What's up?"

"I need your help with something."

And the case intrugued L enough to pull his mind from his twin.

"Worldwide, criminals have been dying of heart attacks (**and so it begins)."**


	10. Forgive, But Do Not Forget

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

The Kira Case began. And everyone heard about it because of L. Near had protested, saying that that kind of move was too risky, but L ignored him, and on public television, pulled a stunt that enraged Kira and began the battle.

"L, are you insane?" B hissed at his computer. He had access to L's computer since L hadn't gotten a new security system yet. L had accepted his video chat request with much reluctance and now he stared at his furious twin_. It's like looking in a mirror. Except the eyes_, L thought. "Kira is going to kill you!" "No he isn't. He needs a name and a face. He has neither," L said flatly. "Openly challenging him will make him upset," Beyond said so vehemently he sent spit on his computer.

"He can throw as many temper tantrums as he likes. I am determined to solve this case," L said mullishly. "He's going to kill you!" "Not if I catch him first."

Silence. Beyond just stared at the screen. Then... "I want to help." "No." The brothers stared each other down. "I don't trust you." Again, four words that hurt more deeply than anything anyone could say. "Don't be like that," B pressed. "Come on!" "No, the Task Force don't even trust me, much less a criminal they search for." "They don't have to know I'm a criminal!" "Why do you want to help?" L asked, not a drop of frustration in his voice. It creeped B out the way L's voice had become so dead. When he'd been a kid, he'd been pretty comatose, but this was scary. He and B had always had bags, but L's were now darker and pronounced. His hair became wilder and wilder as he had less time to mess with it. The twins were changing and B hated it.

"Because I'm your brother?" It sounded like a question. "And I don't want to see you die!" L's eyebrow arched up. "I-I don't know what those dreams were about, I swear. I can't control my dreams. I don't know what was going on. I never wanted you dead. Never. Never have, never will. Please forgive me." Silence. B fidgeted. How could L sit so still for hours without a twitch when he ate so mush frigging sugar? How could he deny his brother his apology when he was so desperate? "You can help. " B smiled as L told him the current coordinates of their headquarters. "and L?" B asked just before L went to end the chat. "What is it, B?" "Thank you."

**Flames? Tar and Feathers? Want to hit me? Please review. Thanks for reading though :) **


	11. Task Force

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

"Are you insane?" L sighed. "Why do you all question my sanity?" The Task Force had finally met him, following all his instructions and opening the door. "If I were Kira, you would be dead, Soichiro Yagami Chief of the Police." He heard the intake of breath and almost sighed again. How stupid were they? "It is known that Kira needs a name and a face to kill. Let's value our lives." He walked away and sat in his chair in his not-very-comforttable-but-necessary position. He noted each of them staring at him like they were fascinated with his face. _Wait till they see Beyond, _he thought.

As if his brother heard him, he returned from the kitchen, a strawberry jam jar in one hand and a spoon in the other. Seeing the Task Force's reaction amused both.

The one called Matsuda jumped a foot in the air with a yelp. The one named Aizawa jerked back. Yagami's eyes widened. "Who is this?" "Isn't it obvious?" L asked, his voice, instead of being mocking, was flat. "We should spell it out for them," B said, his voice mocking. "Don't be so impolite," L said without looking at his brother. "Meet my brother, Beyond. He has agreed to assist in the Kira case."

"Why should we trust him?" Aizawa asked. "Because I trust him and I don't trust many people," L said with certainty. Soichior nodded. Matsuda still looked stunned, _idiot L and B both privately thought, _but the rest of the Task Force seemed to accept this. It was obvious the two were brothers, minus the eyes.

B was fidgety. He spooned some strawberry jam and put it in his mouth, ignoring the blatant stares. He didn't pay attention to the meeting since he already knew the plan and besides he didn't need to hear L explain it. He knew that L was analyzing their responses and profiling them. Call it a twin bond, but B could almost hear L's thoughts. _If I didn't need help these idiot wouldn't be here. I need people. That's it. Not brains since they obviously have none. _Something like that anyways, B thought.

As soon as they left, in pairs and at different times, B talked to L alone. "What are you thinking?" "Don't you know?" L asked. "Yes, but I want confirmation," B said. "I need their help despite their-"

"Stupidity?" Beyond finished. L nodded and a hint of a smile appeared on his face. B sighed. It seemed to be all he he did these days. B held out a hand and brushed L's hair from his face. "Do you ever smile?" he asked. "I just did," L said. "No I mean a real smile, like you used to," B said. "Well I don't have much to smile about," L said as he refilled his teacup with sugar and filled in the cracks with tea. "There's a serial killer who thinks he is a god killing criminals and kills them supernaturally. We have almost no way of knowing how he kills. Why would I smile?" L asked, sipping his tea. He picked up a sugar cube delicately between his thumb and forefinger and dropped it in his mouth.

"You'll figure it out, like you always do. You know the public think you and Near are the same person? Either that or they think you're a vigilante who never fails. You won't fail this time either," B said firmly, clapping his brother on the back. "I've never had a case involving the supernatural," L muttered. "I told the police I will win, but I am doubtful."

B smiled all of a sudden. "Why are you smiling?" L demanded. "Because this is the first step. The fact that you told me your doubts shows that you trust me!"

**Score one for B! **


	12. Every Time

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. **

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

The Task Force did not like Beyond Birthday. He was a genius, he was intelligent, just like his brother, but he was less emotionless and he was impudent. Useful, but impudent.

"That is too bold a move, L," Near argued. "He won't be able to do anything, Near," L argued. "Near, come on! You lack action. We need to do something," B protested. "It's too risky," Near replied. "You can't win if you're always on the defensive," the twins said at the same time. "Did I tell you guys how creepy that is?" Matsuda said idly as he watched Light Yagami, one of the suspects, in his room. "Four times," L said. "I had it down for six times," B said. "I didn't count the times when he said we were 'eerie'," L added.

"Kira won't be able to kill me without my real name. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't because then we would know he was Kira," L explained. "You have a point," Near said. "If Light Yagami kills you, I will get his head and-" B trailed off as he noticed the expression on Soichiro Yagami's face. "My son is NOT Kira," Soichiro hissed. "We haven't proved it yet, but I firmly believe that he is Kira," L said. "I agree with L," Near said. "Then you're wrong," Soichiro said stubbornly. B laughed. It was not a nice laugh.

"Oh yes, this makes sense. Two of the most intelligent people in the world who have solved every case that was thrown at them and have a six sense for the criminal mind are wrong because a police officer says so? You're letting your feelings get in the way, Yagami. If your son was Kira, you'd let it slide." Yagami lunged at B. Mogi shoved him back and L held a hand to B's chest, preventing him from lunging forward to meet the challenge. "How dare you! Are you insinuating that I'm not doing my duty?" Soichiro yelled. "Oh look a five-syllabled word," B taunted. "I'm 'insinuating' that you let your emotions control you. You're of no use!"

B was fired up. He was sure that Kira was Light and so was B and Near. Why was this stubborn man refusing to see it? He was seeing red.

"What about you?What do you contribute? You just make snide comments and criticize us. You don't do anything. You just listen to your brother and defend his actions and words. What do you call that? You are ruled by _your _emotions That's all you can do. The only reason you're even helping us is because your brother's friend is leading this Case!" B leaped at him and L shoved him back.

B wasn't hearing anything. The rushing was back, the red haze falling over his eyes. He threw a punch at the person blocking him.

But L wasn't the child he'd been. He caught the punch and twisted B's arm behind his back. "Calm down, B," L whispered in B's ear from behind. "Calm down." The haze faded away. B sighed and relaxed. L let go of him. "Thanks, L. Ouch," B winced, stretching his arm out. "Soichiro-san. Please calm down," Near said calmly. "I suggest you take a break outside, five minutes." Soichiro glared and straightened his jacket with offended dignity. He resisted the urge to stomp and walked out, head held high and back stifff.

"Why do you have to start fights?" L asked B. He was ignoring the stares of the Task Force. "I didn't start it," B protested. "You fanned the flames," L argued. "You've distracted us all. When we fight amongst ourselves, Kira wins. He can't win," L said. "But you're right! And he won't admit it," B said, a little hurt. "You too, five minutes," Near said. "No. He might run into Soichiro and start a fight with none of us around," L contradicted.

They slowly went back to work. Occasionally glancing at the twins when they thought neither was looking.

###############

"It doesn't add up," B muttered. "You're right. I think Light Yagami is Kira and Misa Amane is the second Kira and they were killing of their own will," L said. "But I have no proof. But something is wrong here, I can sense it. I'm missing something." He peered distractedly at his computer. His theory should be less than ten percent, but his head screamed one hundred percent. B was the only one who understood this.

##############

"I can't believe you're handcuffing yourself to Light," B said. "Is this really necessary, Ryuzaki?" Light asked. "This is as difficult for me as it is for you," L droned. "Is this what you meant by being together 24 hours a day with him? Looking at you I would never have gussed. Are you on that side of the fence?" B gritted his teeth. Misa Amane was a nuisance and she pissed him off _**every time she opened her loud mouth. **_"I told you I'm not doing this because I want to okay?"

_**"**_But Light belongs to me. I don't want to share him with you," Misa protested. "If you're with him 24-7 how are we supposed to go on dates?" "Oh you can still go on dates, but it'll have to be the three of us," L said. "No way!Are you telling me we have to kiss in front of you and stuff?" Misa whined. "I'm not telling you to do anything, but yes, I suppose I would be watching." "Oh gross. You really are a pervert, aren't you?" Misa almost screamed.

"Light, please make Misa stop talking," L said as B said, "Tell your girlfriend to shut up." "I'm standing right here," Misa said. "We know, but I don't have the patience to explain it to you," B said, wondering if she would catch the implication in his words. "You're boyfriend does know how to explain things in one syllables and simplicity, though. Well you know what they say, practice makes perfect and I bet he has a lot of practice with you."

Misa pouted. "Light, Ryuzaki's twin keeps annoying me. He keeps saying stuff I don't understand." "And never will," B stage-muttered. "He's doing it again! Make him stop," Misa wailed. "It's okay Misa," Light said. "L, you're insane," B said. "Stop telling me," L said. "Why would you want to chain yourself to my Light? Oh wait, you're on that side of th-" B snapped at Misa's words. "Are you fucking DEAF?" B yelled. "How many times does he have to say it to get it into your thick blond head? _He isn't doing this because he wants to!"_

"He's yelling at me, Light," Misa cried and she hugged her boyfriend tightly. "I give up. But I'm not leaving L's side," B said. L stared at him in disbelief. "No way! Now both of them are going to be with Light?" Misa began arguing, but no one paid her any attention. They focused on the argument between the brothers and Light.

"No! It's bad enough that a panda-eyed sugar-freak is chained to me and now another is going to follow me? I'm not Kira!"

"I don't trust you as you should very well know by now. If you think I'm leaving you alone with my baby brother, you're nuts!"

"I am not your baby brother."

"I'm way older."

"Seven minutes and thirty seconds."

"Is that relevant? Is this really necessary?"

"I'm not going to leave you guys alone."

Silence.

"Light! Stop them!"

"Shut up, Miss Amane. I'll say it again if you didn't understand."


	13. Just Another Day

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

**Did I freak you out? Just wondering. I freaked myself out, but that might've been because I was intending to. I know I am such a freak. Whatevers. I don't care about my own freakiness. Well Enjoy :). Hey I know that this symbol :) means happy, but was is :3 supposed to mean? Is it a french guy with a moustache?**

"Man, this is the lamest date I've ever been on."

It was midday. They sat in Misa Amane's apartment. Light and L sitting on one couch, Misa facing them with an annoyed expression, and B pacing in front of the window. "Oh no! What a shame!" B said sarcastically. "Please, pretend I'm not even here. Hey are you going to eat that piece of cake?" "Cake makes you fat. I'm not going to eat any," Misa said. "Actually I've found that you don't gain any weight as long as you burn calories by using your brain." B laughed. "Now you're calling me stupid? Fine, I'll give you the cake if you leave me and Light alone!"

"Does it really matter? There are cameras all around this building. Even if we both left, you'd still be supervised. So it wouldn't make a difference," B said, stopping his pacing. "You pervert!" "Call me whatever you like," B said. "Last chance for cake," L said as he reached across the table and snatched the cake.

#############

Light punched L, sending him flying back and unintentionally, himself. He was yanked after L. B turned around. Misa screamed and stepped on L's abandoned cake. She screamed again, higher this time and B covered his ears.

Light grabbed the front of L's shirt and B growled, his brotherly instincts kicking in. He lunged at L, his fist connecting with Light's head and the force sent him into the wall. But B had forgotten the handcuffs. L went flying with him and ended up facedown on the carpet a few inches from Light. They stood up and resumed fighting. B watched with amusement. L was a good fighter. He was a good kicker and clearly Light wasn't trained at all. L must've been trained. What he did seem a little like capoeira. B himself had learned several fighting styles, so capoeira seemed more like a dance than fighting. It was still effective though and he winced to himself in satisfaction every time L's foot made contact.

The problem with them two fighting was that every time one of them pushed too hard or fell back too far, the other ended up going with them. Of course, this made the fight more hilarious.

The phone rang. B picked it up. "Hello?" he said. "Stop them! Why are you just standing there?" Matsuda's panicked voice sounded from the speaker. Behind him, B could faintly hear Near's voice saying this isn't progress. "This is fun to watch. But yeah, I'll stop them."

B turned to them. "Hey, guys! Knock it off!" When they didn't, he said into the phone, "Well I tried." "This is not the time for jokes, Birthday. Put the phone on speaker," Near commanded from the phone. B pressed the button. "Stop this instant, both of you." They did, both of them having each other's shirt collar. Light looked furious while L looked bored. "Let go of each other and back away."

Slowly, they did. B laughed again at the expression on Light and Misa's faces. "Just another day for a detective and a serial killer, right?"

Light lunged at B, yanking L with him. B seized his hand and punched Light's face only to yelp as something hard hit his head. Misa! That bitch had thrown a plate at him.


	14. Deep Down

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

"Disgraceful. Pathetic. Unprofessional behavior. Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

It was the afternoon now and they were back at headquarters. B sat on the couch with L and Light across from him. Light sported a bloody nose while L rubbed his temple. Misa, to B's great displeasure, sat beside him. She was pouting and had only just stopped ranting when Near came and told her to be quiet before going into a rant himself, albeit, a calm and collected rant while Misa mostly screamed.

B winced. His head was bleeding where the china plate had shattered and a bit had gotten stuck in. He'd yanked it out and it wasn't bleeding seriously, but the towel he held to his head was fairly wet and red.

"Why should we have anything to say?" B spoke. "Light attacked L and his bitchy girlfriend threw a plate at me." Misa squealed and B glared at her. "Yeah, I was talking about you."

"Language, Beyond Birthday," Near said sternly. "You're not my boss and besides, I'm only here because L is here," B said, annoyed that Near would reprimand him like he was a misbehaving school boy.

"Be that as it may, you are still under my orders-" Near began to say something else, but B interrupted. Predictably, L thought.

"Listen, Near. We're not children you can reprimand, all right? We can't promise it won't happen again and this little 'meeting' is going nowhere, okay?" B said. "It appears to me that you do the talking a lot, Birthday. What does L have to say?" Near asked, his tone of voice irritating B immediately. "I cannot promise it will no happen again since he did attack me," L said. "Hah!" B said childishly, but feeling the need to so so anyway.

"Just don't let it happen again, okay?" Near said and he walked away and sat at his computer.

"You're a meanie," Misa told B. "Wonderful," B said. "You're nasty to Misa Misa. Misa Misa is glad she threw a plate at you."

"Well I'm not," B said. "You'd better not do that again or I'll throw something back. And I have good aim. And several hard and pointy objects in mind."

"You meanie! Light!" Misa cried. "Make the freaky twin go away." "How old are you? Five?" B sneered at her.

L stood up, his handcuff tugging at Light's. "Come on, back to work."

############

B didn't sleep at a house. He slept at headquarters on the couch. He had no idea where or how L and Light slept. It turned out, Light slept on a bed while L worked on his laptop before falling asleep in the chair. B was indignant, but L assured him that he didn't mind a bit.

It was strange how quickly the brothers trusted each other after so long. How much they had missed each other. He liked to stare at the ceiling and think about his life before he went to sleep, but usually this resulted in nightmares since his life was no fairy tale. Hell, no one's life was a fairy tale, not even Misa Amane's, who was famous and rich and had everything she wanted.

B's thoughts turned to his brother and then the dreams he had had about him. As always, his heart went cold whenever he thought about these dreams. Did he really want his brother dead? No, he loved his brother. Wanted to hug him, wanted to protect him, wanted to talk to him, wanted his brother to trust him. He didn't want his brother dead. He didn't want his brother dead. What was wrong with him? Why would he dream things like that? Was he insane deep inside? What was wrong with him? He didn't want his brother dead. He didn't want his brother dead.

And no matter how many times he repeated this, B was afraid that, deep down ,he did. And L would die.


	15. Sick

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

It got worse. B began seeing red hazes constantly and for no reason. He'd be talking to Matsuda, running mental laps around the man and laughing, when suddenly his vision would be red and he'd feel the urge to strangle him. He shoved the urges away, but the redness had to fade away. Worse still were the visions. B would be talking to L when suddenly L wouldn't be standing in front of him, but be laying at his feet in a pool of blood, a dagger hilt protruding from his chest. Each time, B looked down and backed up a little, eyes widened with horror. He hadn't thought anyone had noticed.

L had. Every time he and B talked, it would end when B looked down and backed up like he was seeing something no one else could see. Something was wrong, but every time L asked, B would mumble either, "Nerves," or ," Nothing." But L was the world's top three best detectives for nothing. He could read people's emotions, thoughts, and plans before they thought of it themselves. He could sense turmoil, a mix of confusion and fear and almost... anger? inside of B and he was bewildered by it.

B began cutting himself. Something about taking a knife and slicing his arm and watching the blood spill calmed him down. The red hazes were less often when he did this and it became a sort of safeguard against them.

_I would rather hurt myself than kill L._

No one save L noticed anything amiss. B wore long sleeves, so no one saw. He kept up his volatile and uncontrollable temper. He kept up his snarky comments and ideas. He cleaned the sink, rinsed it clean of blood. But L noticed.

############

Light was freed. He was a free man, according to the 13 day rule, but B still didn't trust him. Every time B looked at him, he could've sworn he saw a red flash glint in Light's eye and he wondered why. He would look at Light and see him covered in blood, but somehow, it was not his own. This made B sure Light was Kira. But more disturbing was when B looked at Light and saw bullet wounds and blood all over his body. He didn't know if this was what he wanted or if he was seeing how Light would die, but it disturbed him every time.

"I missed something." It was late, almost two in the morning. B wanted L to go away so he could begin cutting. The hazes kept coming, over and over and he was desperate and feeling a little sick after seeing every one around him dying.

"There is something, some factor I haven't added into the equation. I'm sure Kira is Light Yagami and the second Kira is Misa Amane. Not was. Is. And on their own free will too," L said, putting a finger to his mouth. "L, I'm tired. Could you please leave?" B asked, his voice a little queasy. He sounded sick. L leaned forward in concern. "Are you okay?"

B wasn't okay. His head was spinning and he could feel a headache sinking in. He wanted L to leave. He was seeing red and feeling the horrible urge. "I'm fine, L. Just go home, okay?" B managed to say a little strained, but almost normally. L bit his lip, but stood up and walked away. "Good night, B."

As soon as he was gone, B was up in a flash and in the bathroom, his knife in hand. As he had known, as soon as the blade cut into his arm, the sickness crept away, but to his confusion the red haze stayed. He cut deeper, hoping it would go away.

L turned around on impulse. He would check if B was okay. B might've been embarrassed that he was sick, but L worried about his twin.

"B, what are you doing?" The shout shocked B and he jerked. The red haze solidified. Now he saw his brother standing at the bathroom door, having flung it open.

Panic rushed through his senses. Blood seemed to fill his mouth. His body and mind filled with one instinct, one driven voice that screamed one thing. Without thinking or stopping to consider the consequences, he obeyed the command and lunged forward with the knife and sunk the ten inch long knife into his twin's body.


	16. Blood

**Disclaimer: I don't own a Death Note. I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

L stared at the source of the burning agony in his chest. A knife. A knife B had been holding to his bleeding arm when L had gotten in. B's blood mixed with his.

The knife twisted, sendind fire running through his veins. He cried out and his eyes met the eyes of his brother. No, a killer. B's red eyes glinted with something sinister and he didn't look like Beyond Birthday, the twin he loved. The knife twisted deeper and he heard B's maniacal laugh.

And suddenly, B got a hold on himself. His mouth dropped.

He had stabbed L. He had stabbed L. Had stabbed L. Had stabbed L. _Stabbed. _

B yelled and let go of the knife in shock. He watched his brother teeter unsteadily before falling backwards. His blood began to pool around his body, just like B's bloody visions. B was still in shock. He just stared at the growing pool of blood. Then his mind kicked in and he crouched near his brother.

"L! L!"

No matter how much he shook him, no matter how long or constantly he shouted his name, no matter how much he hurt inside, L's eyes closed.

Panic, fear, pain, horror, grief. It overwhelmed him. He could only stare at L's limp form spread on the floor. Hsi eyes were closed. He almost never closed his eyes, not even to blink.

Then his mind kicked in and all the emotions were bottled up. He felt only icy calm as he gazed down at his twin. B needed to get away. In a few hours, the Task Force would get here. He needed to dispose of the evidence. He leaned down and pulled the knife from L's body.

The murder weapon was heavy in his hands. He licked at it and it tasted murder. It tasted of blood and despair and griefand pain and betrayal. But mostly it tasted of blood.

**It's like no shit it tastes like blood ya just stabbed someone, Beyond. But I wanted a dramatic ending (to this chapter, don't worry I'm writing more) and this seemed dramatic to me, I hope. Please review. **


	17. Pain in the Mind

**Disclaimer: I don't own a Death Note. I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

Light stared gleefully at L. He was lying in a hospital bed, for once, his eyes shut. For the first time, he looked vulnerable and it would've done Light no greater pleasure to kill the man right now. But no, he would wait. If he killed L now, it would be too obvious. He would kill him tonight.

The best thing was, he didn't have to kill the panda-eyed nuisance. His twin had done it for him.

Light was still surprised at this developement. He remembered disliking and even hating the twin, but he had L's twin after all. Just as clever as L, if not nearly as stable. He still found it unbelievable that L's twin, the one person he trusted, had stabbed him and then ran away from the scene. If it hadn't been for Watari, who'd been up to check on L, he would've died, damn it.

Light would've been worried about the B factor. B was gone now and neither he, nor Rem, or anyone really could kill him without his face or name. Still, what did he have to worry about? If B killed his own twin, what were the chances he would come back to help him?

"Is he going to be all right?" Matsuda asked. The doctor turned to him. "He'll live. The blade missed his heart by inches and he almost bled to death, but he'll be fine after a few days."

_In a few days he'll be dead, _Light thought. _He'll go into shock and die. _

L woke up feeling like crap. His chest was burning. But mostly his heart was. Oh, sure, B had stabbed his chest near the heart and it burned like fury. But the betrayal burned more. L couldn't hate his brother, but why had this happened? HE refused to believe B wanted him dead. L had surprised him by opening the bathroom door. B had panicked since he'd been caught doing something unstable and in blind panic had taken the knife and stabbed him. But after he got over his panic, why had he left L bleeding on the floor? L had known something was wrong. Maybe-? The dreams had come back? The feelings had come back? Maybe in that one moment of panic, the feelings had overwhelmed his brother and he'd done something he would regret?

#############

B ran away that night. He hotwired someone's car and just fled. Fled his brother.

Part of his mind was in shock, the other in icy dead determination. The murder weapon lay in the seat beside him. Memories whirled through his head, several times almost causing him to crash into either a fire hydrant, a lampost, or some other inanimate object.

_Their mother dying and the two being forced to seperate. Escaping and living on their own, relying only on each other on the streets. Being found and brought to the Whammy House. Finding his brother with two broken legs and broken ribs after being pushed off that roof. Seeing his brother unconscious at the bottom of the pool and diving in to rescue him. Watching the moon from their room and wondering what to do with their lives. _

_L didn't get that choice anymore. _

Unbidden, tears crawled down his cheeks.

**Flames? Tar and Feathers? Pitchfork? Crucifixion? Review?**


	18. Deception

**Disclaimer: I don't own a Death Note. I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

Six Years passed. Kira was thriving. He had almost half of the world's consent and the tables were turning on the people pursuing Kira. But with L gone, the case wouldn't go anywhere.

The media didn't know that L was dead, but B did. The area of his soul where L was, was empty, a void that tore at his insides and drained all life from him. He worked as a laborer, never saying a word. Co-workers attempted conversation, but he answered in monosyllables.

Life seemed so pointless. B worked, he slept sometimes, and he stared blankly at a wall. There was no variation. Wake up. Go to work. Come home. That was it. The only variation was if he didn't sleep at all and that cancelled out Wake up. What a meaningless existence. What a monotonous circle.

B didn't let himself feel. He became more like L, holding back the tides of emotions. If they weren't restrained, he would drown in them, so he held them back.

Life would've gone on like this if it hadn't been for an old friend.

B lived in a small apartment, the only one he could afford with his meager savings. It was sparsely furnished with shabby furniture and an inch deep of dust. There were a few chairs, a rickety table and a narrow bed.

The bed was besides a window. B sat on the bed, legs drawn up to his chest like a certain someone, his finger at his mouth like a certain person, and stare out the window at the sky, like he used to do with a certain someone. When he had been a different someone.

"Beyond?" B didn't even flinch. "Why are you here?" B didn't turn his head, even though he now knew who was behind him. "Not a nice way to greet a friend. Tell me, why do you live in this dump?" B focused on the sound of heavy boots on the thick dust. "What's it to you, Mello?"

Mello gazed at his friend. B turned to Mello, his finger falling from his mouth, his legs straightening out. His eyes alarmed Mello the most. The red eyes that used to sparkle, no, explode with emotion were dead and dull. Mello wondered if his plan would even work. He'd been imagining Beyond seething with emotion, as always. This was a setback.

"I just want to know. Why would a genius like you live at a hovel like this place?" Mello asked. B shrugged and Mello inwardly scowled. This would be harder than he thought. "Why was the door unlocked? Anyone could walk in here." "I don't care," B said dully, his voice very similiar to his twin's.

"Where are your emotions? Your room-" Mello was interrupted. "My room is as empty as my heart, or wherever the fuck my emotions come from. L was my muse, I suppose. I know that sounds stupid, but without him, life seems so like him. You know, cold," B said and a flicker lit in his eyes for a brief second and raising Mello's hope. "He's not dead."

**Flames? Tar and Feathers? Pitchfork? Crucifixion? Review?**


	19. Fine

**Disclaimer: I don't own a Death Note. I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

B leaped at Mello. He shoved the man against his wall, one fist twisted in the man's shirt, the other pounding against the wall. "You filthy liar! Why would you say something like that, knowing how it would hurt me?" B let go of the man and shoved passed him through the door. Mello followed him.

"I'm sorry. But I needed to get a reaction out of you," Mello protested. B glared at him and looked away, glaring instead at his kitchen table."You didn't kill him, you know." B whirled on him, eyes blazing.

"You don't know! You don't know! I had the knife! i stabbed him! I ran! I left him to bleed to death on the floor. I let him die! And he was trying to help me!" His words were gargled as he began to sob uncontrollably. "I was cutting myself. And he tried to stop me. And I-I don't know what happened. I-I lost c-control. I k-kill-led him. It's my fault. He loved me. And I had his trust. I didn't d-deserve it. And I betray-yed him. Re-remember when w-we were kids? And I hit him? H-He was afraid of m-me. I p-promised Mom that i would protect him."

B dissolved into tears, pitiful sobbing and heartfelt pain. His emotions were running high. Mello needed to use this. He felt a flicker of guilt at tricking his friend, but it had to be done.

"But he was going to survive," Mello said, hoping his words would confuse and intrugue B. They did. B looked up from the table. "Explain."

_L Lawliet. Blood loss and shock at midnight. Light wrote the words in the death note as soon as he found Misa. The following day, L had died exactly like he'd written it. "But the doctor said he'd be okay," Matsuda had cried in despair. _

_Mello had thought this had sounded strange. He had Matt hack the hospital systems and found L was supposed to recover. So how had he died? Easy answer. Kira. So Kira was one of them. Again, hacking the computers, Mello had access to L's computer and he read L's suspicions against Light Yagami. L was never wrong. _

_So Light had killed L._

Could it be true? B stared at his childhood friend. Could it be another lie? What could Mello possibly gain from a lie? His service? Perhaps. "How do you know?" "L is never wrong. He was going to live. His blood rate was going up, not down and suddenly it falls and he goes into shock? Not L. He'd never go into shock. Maybe from sugar loss, but never blood loss." Those words set off a light bulb in B's head.

"I shocked him when I stabbed him," he said. "He probably couldn't believe it." "But he was conscious," Mello contradicted. "For some time. Then suddenly, he just dies? Out of the blue? When he was recovering? No, L had a strong spirit. He was murdered." "By me," B yelled wretchedly. "By Kira!" Mello yelled back. "And you should have vengance. Retribution." "We don't even know who Kira is," B said miserably. "Yes we do! Light Yagami. L didn't have enough evidence. Don't let him die in vain."

"What do you suggest I do?" B asked. "Kill him. Kill the man who murdered your brother, whose murdered millions without blinking an eye. Kill the man who believes himself to be God. Don't let your brother's death be in vain."

Silence. "I had a feeling you weren't here for my company. You want me to kill Light Yagami? Fine."

**Reviews? Is anyone reading this? Am I talking to myself? Should I be in an institution? **


	20. Good Morning

**Disclaimer: I don't own a Death Note. I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

The plan was simple. Rush in with guns blazing. Mello wanted Light dead. That was it. He knew Light was Kira. He didn't have enough evidence. B wanted revenge. He was going to get it. They were going to get rid of Kira. B might die in the attempt. Everyone was happy. Except Light. But who cared about a serial killer's feelings?

_I'll be seeing you soon, brother, _Beyond thought with some morbidity. In his hand he held a gun. This was literally a suicide mission. He was going in to a police headquarters with one gun. He wanted his life to end with a bang and quickly. He was going down fighting and he wanted to take Light down with him.

He parked the car some miles away. B mingled with the crowd, changing hats or coats ever corner, giving homeless guys the clothes he changed out of. Each time, he kept his face down and his shoulders held high. He wore contacts. For dramatic effect.

###############

Light smirked inwardly as he watched the police struggle to find Kira. It ws hopeless. These idiots weren't going to catch Kira without L. L was the only competition. He was the only one worth having in this game. The game wasn't worth playing if the players were useless. L was more fun and he was a worthy opponent to defeat. Light almost yearned for intelligent conversation with someone like L.

As if to answer his unspoken prayer, the door swung open. And a reincarnation stepped into the room.

"L?"

###############

Beyond enjoyed the looks of astonishment on the team's faces. His shoulders were hunched over, his finger to his mouth, his last change of clothes baggy jeans and white shirt. His eyes were ringed with black bags.

"Good morning," he said flatly imitating L's drone. "R-R-Ryuzaki?" Aizawa stammered. Matsuda gasped and fell back, hand falling back to clutch his chair. Light's reaction was most amusing of all. He screamed and fell to the ground. "L?" he said again. Then his eyes widened in horror. B smiled. He'd lingered long enough. "Hello, Light. Did you miss me?"

Before Light could full realize exactly who he was facing, B whipped out a gun and fired. Repeatedly. Matsuda screamed something incomprehensible and B didn't feel anything. He dropped the gun as blood fell down his face. He turned and smiled at Matsuda. "You idiot."

Being shot in the head kills you instantly, but B was somehow still alive to hear that Light was dead. Good. He'd done the job right.

He faded into blackness.

**Reviews? Please? I have another chapter in mind, but I don't know if I should continue. Could you tell me how you feel about this?**


	21. Four Words

**Disclaimer: I don't own a Death Note. I own nothing Death Note-ish. I gain no profit. I only gain embarrassment from my pathetic, floundering attempts to write a proper story. Any exact copies of dialogues are not MINE!**

B woke up. Where was he? He lay on a purple hill and a storm raged around him. Lightning flashed in the gray-purple clouds overhead. Thunder rumbled. The wind picked up, howling in his ears. And a tornado formed on the horizon. He watched it, fascinated, as it spun toward him. It dissipated before touching him, and he watched as a person was deposited in front of him. And he wasn't surprised.

"L!" He threw his arms around his twin. L returned the hug. B began to cry in relief and remorse. And L cried in just plain joy and happiness.

"Do you hate me?" B asked. "I could never bring myself to hate you. I've never hated you."

All was forgiven. Everything. Just like that. It was amazing that four words could make him so escstatic and so happy and euphoric. B never felt so alive. Even though he was dead, technically. He laughed and L joined him, not knowing why, but sharing his joy.

Four words was all it took.


End file.
